For Local Blog in MinneapolisDo Effective Time Outs Teach Parent? or Child?
March 2nd, 2009
When a child misbehaves, putting them in a time out is not fun, but it is necessary. Those few minutes are priceless for me becase they teach me to be a better mom. During this quiet time, I ask myself: “How can I make this a teachable moment and respond calmly? “I have learned some great lessons and sometimes even amazed myself.
I can also see what my son has learned, because he told a friend of his. It helps him think things through and learn what he could do differently. How cool is that?
He is 8 1/2 and there are times we still have time outs. When they are over, I sit down with him and ask him why I put him in a time out and then ask him to tell me why that is important.
The real answer comes down to two things. First of all, taking time to think through what is wrong is good if we learn from it. The second is that when he gets older, I want him to respect all people and that has to start at home. Then we hug and move forward.
Please share stories below about experiences you have had with time outs in your household. What have you learned about yourself or your child through the process. I look forward to hearing your answers.
Book Covers from the award winning Bur Bur and Friend’s children’s book series: Bur Bur and Friends is a cast of multicultural characters who educate kids about sports, outdoor exploration and active play though their experiences.
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April 3rd, 2009 at 6:52 am
I think time outs are effective for both parent and child. I’ve used them to diffuse situations and myself. We lived in an apartment for so many years with all four kids so we had to be a little creative with them. The stool in the bathroom for instance…. Now in our house we still use them but it’s usually just go to your room timeouts.
Super Nanny and she always has the Magic Spot but always in view of where the action is so for us that never would have worked. Our spazzes needed to be far away.
One thing that makes us laugh is when either of us says “Seperate rooms-now!” and all of them will yell “I call this room!” If you all want to be in this room, then get along, and stay in this room. Seriously can’t they just figure that out?
Did anyone growing up have to “stand in a corner”? I had to do that. Oh the memories……